The sadness and fear are still with me. However, there have been several encouraging things to happen in the past 24 hours. After I posted last night I went to bed and read from Magnificent Prayer the words for the day. The editor/compiler of the book, Nick Harrison, quotes A.T. Pierson who said: All practical power over sin . . . depends on maintaining closet communion. Those who abide in the secret place with God show themselves mighty to conquer evil, and strong to work and to war for God. They are seers who read His secrets; they know His will; they are the meek whom He guides in Judgment and teaches His way. They are His prophets who speak for Him to others, and even forecast things to come. They watch the signs of the times and descern His tokens and read His signal.
Harrison commments and says: This definition of a pray-er finds many of us falling short. We possess little power because we pray so little. The power we possess as Christians will be in proportion to our communion with God. Weak Christians are often weak because they don't spend time with the source of strength.
Today, cast all your weakness on Him. Claim His strength as your own. He who lives in you can face anything on today's agenda. Watch, and He will guide you with His eye.
Reading that was what I needed! I went to sleep with a picture of Jesus with Tom in His arms and with me being held in God's hands. It made today easier, keeping that thought that Christ could/would face whatever there was in my day's agenda--but still there is sadness and fear. I learned upon arriving at the nursing home that Tom had been awake a good bit of the night and that he wandered and looked for me. They have all kinds of monitors to alert the staff when he gets up as they don't want him getting up without assistance. He has been resistant to that instruction! Today when I was helping him to the sink to wash his hands he began to sway and fall toward me. Fortunately we had someone visiting who could push the call button for help.
He continues to be confused, a problem I believe would get better if he were home with me. The flip side is he's not strong enough to come home and I have a growing fear that he will not regain enough strength to do so.
Two encouraging things were observed. I went to PT with him and watched him really try to do the things they asked of him. Shortly after his workout, a friend brought Meredith (four years old) to see him. What a sweet smile spread across his face when he saw her. It was the most alert I saw him all day. Her visit and her hugs will be the best medicine of the day.
Schools are closed for tomorrow because of a predicted winter storm. That may mean that it will be difficult for me to get to the nursing home. Tommy was here when I got home from church tonight. He had wrapped our faucets and closed up a door that goes under the house. I know I will be glad he did!