Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The Tough Decision . . .

Since I last posted Tom's condition has continued to change--to the point that yesterday Tommy and I both looked at him and knew something was different. He doesn't do anything but sleep and his eyes are vacant. I was told by the neurologist that there wasn't much about Tom that is reversible--definitely hard to hear, but not totally unexpected. Our observation plus counsel from two doctors led us to ask for the paliative care team to evaluate and advise. We met with them this afternoon. Their recommendation is to move Tom to the hospice area on the oncology floor. I said the decision was tough, but it was made easier by having Tom's wishes documented in his Advance Directive. We called Marty for her input, she concurred, so tomorrow I do necessary paperwork to have him moved. If he stabilizes or if by some miracle, he improves we can bring him home which is what he prefers. I don't expect that to happen.

Last night Tommy and I had a serious, frank "discussion" with Tom. Who knows what he comprehended? After Tommy finished assuring his dad that he would care for me and how much he loved him, Tom says, "I'd like to go to the kitchen for some cookies." Of course, he was hard to understand, but he knew what he wanted! Next, we prayed for him, asking for God's healing and for God to come quickly. I spent the night because I couldn't bear to leave him. He has slept most of today and showed no expression when I kissed him goodbye and said I was coming home.

Fortunately, I don't believe Tom knows the seriousness of his condition. He may not even know he's in the hospital. He surely doesn't know that he's been there three weeks. Your prayers and concern, your FB messages, e-mails, cards and calls have sustained us. I am so grateful! We know that Tom is safe in the arms of Jesus and that he will have a new body and a new mind when God calls him home. How I'll miss him!

Blessings,
Pastor Margaret

9 comments:

Unknown said...

Sending prayers, love and healing thoughts for the steps ahead of you on your journey and for your entire family.

Peace.

Unknown said...

My heart goes out to you, Tommy & Marty. My prayers are with you.

Bill Ballou said...

The Ballous send our love. We will pray for God's arms to enfold you all with His love and strength.

Anonymous said...

Many prayers of comfort and peace for you and your family!!!

Andrea said...

Awwww (((((Margaret & Tom & the entire family))))). My prayers & best wishes are with you all. These are hard times right here. How I understand.

God's blessings~ Andrea
xoxoxo

Convertible Girl said...

I'm Marty's across-the-street neighbor. We're sending prayers to join with yours. Marty's letter on her blog today was a beautiful testament to the parents that you and Tom have been to her.

Laura Callaghan said...

Pastor Margaret, I know this is a difficult time. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all. The Callaghan Family

Anonymous said...

Peace to you, today and always.

ANN READ said...

I WAS ANN FUNCHESS AND I WENT ALL THTU SCHOOL WITH TOMMY. i THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR
WRITINGS. i ALSO WENT TO CENTRAL PRES. I, TOO, HAVE PARKINSON'S DISEASE AND HAD BREAST CANCER IN THE EARLY 80'S. I HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT YOU DON'T DIE FROM PD THAT IS SOME COMPLICATION THAT KILLS YOU. I WAS HOPING YOU WOULD TELL ME MORE ABOUT HIS FINAL DAYS OF PD. THANK YOU AGAIN FOR YOUR LOVELY MEMORIAL.