Less than a week . . .
My emotions are still on a roller coaster. There has been so much to do in the last three months with endless arrangements to be made, business to comprehend and settle, sorting and packing. I don't think I'll be ready by Thursday, but what choice do I have?
I wonder if I'm ready to walk out, close this chapter and get on with my life as a widow. It's still a harsh word--a hard situation, but I continue to remember Meredith's words: Paw Paw's in your heart. He literally fills my heart to the brim with all the memories and all his love and the tears don't flow as freely.
A couple of weeks ago I began reading through the Bible in Eugene Peterson's The Message. It seems that when I have important decisions to make God focuses my attention on Abraham and the covenant God made with him. The best promise in all of Scripture is the one where God says: I will be your God. There is none more meaningful! It is rich and incredibly full. There is nothing to dread, nothing to fear. I can be sure that God will always care for me and it's because of who He is, not what I do or don't do.
In Peterson's introduction to Genesis, his opening paragraph says: First, God. God is the subject of life. Gd is foundational for living. If we don't have a sense of the primacy of God, we will never get it right, get life right, get "our" lives right. Not God at the margins; not God as an option; not God on the weekends. God at center and circumference; God first and last; God, God, God. This is our covenant making, covenant keeping God.
God will go before me as I move.......